Do you know your love language?

Do you know your love language?

Do you know the love languages? Similar to a personality, creative, temperament or any other test, it is imperative that you understand your love language because it not only affects how you relate with different people in your circle but also how you treat them. I have heard parents complain about their kids detaching themselves from them and vice versa, friends complaining about their “changed friends” as well as couples and marriages break up because at some point one person didn’t feel loved anymore whether by their partner or parents. Does this make any sense? This tells you that love languages are not important to couples but also other relationships.

There are five love languages that mean different things to different people. Among them is physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service and gift-giving. These are ways in which people express their love to each other, meaning that what works for one person may not necessarily work for another. What am I saying? If for instance my dominant language is acts of service but you offer me more gifts in place of it, then, by all means, you will not be communicating my language, a result of which my love tank will be empty. Important to note is that most people only have one dominant language, which has to be continuously tapped into for that particular person to feel loved.

The other four then should act as supplements. However, we do have rare individuals who possess two dominant love languages otherwise known as the bilinguals. For this group, you will still be safe if you tapped into either of their dominant languages. The secret is to first understand how you feel most loved, and then understand how your child, spouse or friend would want to be loved. How then do you discover your language? One way is to identify what tickles your fancy. What makes you feel most loved? Do you prefer to spend more time with your family as a way of demonstrating your love or would you rather lend a hand to your friends, siblings or husband? What touches you the most or speaks volumes is your dominant love language.

Another way to discover your language is to find out the manner in which you yourself express your love to others. This could give you insights into how you would also want to be loved. For instance, if you prefer assisting your friends as a way of expressing your love to them then it could also be likely that that’s how you would love for others to demonstrate their love for you. The last method will require you to conduct a love test, similar to that of a personality test to discover your language. Understanding this, therefore, helps you learn how to teach people how to love you as well as gives you insights as to how you should treat your family members, siblings, friends, and even your spouse. Find out how to express love to them and see how everything turns around for you.

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